Forgiveness to Improve Happiness

It takes a lot of soul searching to forgive those that have hurt you, however holding on to anger only brings you more pain. Research clearly demonstrates the impact negative emotions, such as stress, can have on your overall health and happiness. When you're holding on to anger, you punish yourself unnecessarily.

Forgiveness is more than conscious. It involves letting go of the deep subconscious feelings your anger has left behind. Therefore, when you decide to forgive you also need to be mindful that you may think you've moved on, but the hurt lags behind. Its easy to think you're forgiving, but when you dig deep or things remind you of what has upset you, the anger and pain will show you whether you have really forgiven or not.

When you're angry, so many things are often said that you wish you could take back, or get through to the person you are mad at. However, sometimes your feelings and wishes fall on deaf ears and this is the time to let go - trusting you have done all you can to rectify the situation.

True forgiveness of others & particularly yourself is what is required to move on. Where the self forgiveness comes in, is when you are criticizing yourself for putting yourself in a certain situation, not standing up for yourself earlier, and so on.

We need to understand we are human and therefore fallible. When you love someone, it's amazing how much you will excuse and put up with. These things are often things you would strongly advise your close friends to walk away from. So, don't be too hard on yourself for past mistakes.

The mistakes you make in life are in the past - they are gone. So too are the mistakes others have made. You can choose to hold on to anger and pain and live in the past, or you can choose to move forward - forgive & let go.

We often assume if we forgive someone that has hurt us he/she gets away with hurting us without being punished. However, we need to ask ourselves "does holding on to deep anger really punish the person?". Even if you decide a persons behaviour has resulted in you no longer wanting the relationship, you can do this without holding on to the anger and pain. It can be challenging, but if you hold on to the negative emotions, you are the one who suffers most.

So if you're holding on to anything negative in the past, or present, tell yourself today "I'm finally letting go and moving forward."

If you are struggling with issues of forgiveness, contact Happy Life at http://www.happylife.net.au